A necessary truth
I’ve been on a documentary binge the last weekend and one has really left me bothered. I wish I understood my fascination with death, suicide, funeral homes, euthanasia, serial killers… and just mortality in general. My fascination with these topics makes me feel ashamed.. but I guess now that I think about it.. I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember. I did several research papers in high school and college, specifically about euthanasia. I’m not a depressed person, I don’t want to die.. nor have I ever been suicidal. I’m a happy person for the most part.. how can a happy person be so obsessed with learning about such morbid things?
The documentary A Necessary Truth is about young film students in LA who’ve decided to make a documentary for their thesis and final project. This documentary is actually a documentary about the students making a documentary about someone who has decided to end their life. Their purpose is to make a film that no one has ever seen before.. to go where no other film maker has gone. Typically documentaries about mental illness or someone who is suicidal have a happy ending—they end up choosing to live and get help. These students wanted their film’s ending to be just that… the end of someone’s life. They planned to interview this person all the way up to the very last day.. including the actual action of death. It was important to them to choose someone who they actually felt would go through with it. After watching the film.. I can tell you with full honesty that this film did EXACTLY what it wanted to do.
I think the decision making process of the film is what bothers me the most. The students put out a craigslist ad searching for someone who has decided to end their life with a specific date in mind. To see the student’s reaction to how many ad replies they received was just disgusting, but … also so intriguing. Like a bad car accident.. you know you shouldn’t WANT to look.. but you do anyway? And how they decided which person they should use was just bizarre.. “We probably shouldn’t pick the older woman, she’ll likely resolve her issues and not kill herself”… “Let’s not pick the two sisters, they’re just doing this for the fame..” .. and “we should choose him.. because he has a brain tumor and will die anyway.. at least we know there will be an end.” SICK SICK SICK! But.. I kept watching.
You see how the film makers struggle with the subject matter as well as the how the “victim” struggles with his reasons for wanting to die.
They’ve created a film that I’ve never ever seen before.. and ending so shocking that .. seriously.. I just can’t even describe how I feel about it because there are so many emotions. And I know you’re thinking.. “did they actually show it.. “the end” ?” … and the answer is yes.
I don’t know why I wrote this.. but I haven’t written in a while and this is the only thing on my mind today.. sorry to be such a downer!